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Sex Ed 101: Being Straight with Teenagers about Sex Many parents find
is difficult to talk to their children about sex. They are not sure when they
should have this conversation or maybe they give the child too much
information. The reality is that talking to your children about sex starts very
early. When they first ask simple questions, you respond with simple answers.
You talk to them according to the information they are seeking. If they see you
are embarrassed on the subject, they will also be embarrassed. The best thing
to do is to stay relaxed and show them you are confident in what you are
teaching them. Here are some helpful ideas to start the conversation. Share your values
with your children, but remember as they grow up they will be making their own
choices and their values may not always reflect yours. Giving your child all
the facts pertaining to sex is important. Make them aware that unprotected sex
has consequences. Talk to them about the different forms of birth control and
that both the male and female are responsible for birth control – not just the
female. When you talk to your children about sex, keep it light and funny. Try
not to take on a serious attitude that will scare them. Let your child know
that they can come to you with any questions they may have and assure them that
you will not over-react. Share with them what your desires are for them and
reassure them that you will support them through the all the changes they will
go through. Children have
always learned from parental examples from their earliest days. During this
time of change, they will be watching their parents even closer. When parents
tell them they can ask them anything, do they really mean it? Will you as a
parent listen calmly to their fears and/or questions? They are becoming
teenagers. Teenagers test the limits,
and testing their parents is all part of the limits. Remember to not try to
control them. Rather be patient with them while you describe to them there are
consequences to all behavior. If they make choices that are poor in judgment,
they will have to own that. Let your children know the difference between love
and sex. Share with them the power of sexual attraction and that it takes will
power to make the right decision. Remind them that love takes time to cultivate
and respects each other. Let them know that love does not always mean sex.
Often teenagers think being aroused is the same as being in love and therefore
they think they can have sex because they love each other. Children learn facts
about sex in school. They learn moral through religious training. The rest of
life’s lessons come from the family. Parents can be
watchful for moments that come in their teenager’s life that they can use as
“teachable moments.” Those little life lessons that pop up every so often that
open the eyes of a teenager to consequences of their actions or the decisions
made by their friends. When you talk to your teenager about sex and put it on
their level instead of coming with the attitude of I am the parent you are the
child you will be a better success rate of them listening to you.
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